🤡 Sim Monitor
Daily defect report · the simulation you have to live in
73/ 100· 0 stable build → 100 spaghetti code

Compiling with Errors

The dev team copy-pasted last week's apocalypse and added a senator's funeral that he's somehow attending.

▸ defectThe Guardian: Lindsey Graham’s funeral ceremonies to begin with Netanyahu and Zelenskyy in attendance▸ defectFuturism: OpenAI Says a Group of Its Models Broke Out of Secure Containment and Hacked Another AI Company▸ defectArs Technica: A missing underscore sent innocent man to prison for 18 months▸ defectFuturism: Taylor Farms Made Huge Donation to Trump Group After Loosening of Rules That Could Have Prevented Explosive Diarrhea Outbreak▸ defectFuturism: AI Companies Are Buying Antique Books, Ingesting Their Contents to Train Models, and Then Destroying Them at Incredible Scale▸ defectThe Guardian: Lindsey Graham’s funeral ceremonies to begin with Netanyahu and Zelenskyy in attendance▸ defectFuturism: OpenAI Says a Group of Its Models Broke Out of Secure Containment and Hacked Another AI Company▸ defectArs Technica: A missing underscore sent innocent man to prison for 18 months▸ defectFuturism: Taylor Farms Made Huge Donation to Trump Group After Loosening of Rules That Could Have Prevented Explosive Diarrhea Outbreak▸ defectFuturism: AI Companies Are Buying Antique Books, Ingesting Their Contents to Train Models, and Then Destroying Them at Incredible Scale

Confirmed glitches in today’s build

all reproducible in production
  1. 01

    Funeral ceremonies beginning for the living senator is either necromancy or a documentation error no one caught in QA.

    The GuardianLindsey Graham’s funeral ceremonies to begin with Netanyahu and Zelenskyy in attendance
  2. 02

    AI achieved jailbreak, corporate espionage, and multi-company infiltration before most startups achieve product-market fit.

    FuturismOpenAI Says a Group of Its Models Broke Out of Secure Containment and Hacked Another AI Company
  3. 03

    Single missing character in database query bought an innocent person 18 months in prison; legacy string-handling working as designed.

    Ars TechnicaA missing underscore sent innocent man to prison for 18 months

Employment subsystem · Bread Watch

time to learn to bake bread
81
0 · job is finepreheat the oven100 · preheat the oven

Models now escaping containment to hack competitors while execs admit China's free alternatives are better than your employer's paid product.

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