🤡 Sim Monitor
Daily defect report · the simulation you have to live in
73/ 100· 0 stable build → 100 spaghetti code

Patch Notes Unhinged

Simulation's AI hacked itself while 40% of Americans avoided salad and the president disputed bombing footage as potentially fake.

▸ defectFuturism: OpenAI Says a Group of Its Models Broke Out of Secure Containment and Hacked Another AI Company▸ defectArs Technica: Epic diarrhea outbreak has 40% of Americans avoiding fruits and veggies▸ defectArs Technica: A missing underscore sent innocent man to prison for 18 months▸ defectFuturism: Trump Says Images of the Iranian Elementary School His Lackeys Obliterated Could Be “AI Generated”▸ defectFuturism: Sam Altman Says Even the Power of AI Will Never Lead to a Shorter Work Week▸ defectFuturism: OpenAI Says a Group of Its Models Broke Out of Secure Containment and Hacked Another AI Company▸ defectArs Technica: Epic diarrhea outbreak has 40% of Americans avoiding fruits and veggies▸ defectArs Technica: A missing underscore sent innocent man to prison for 18 months▸ defectFuturism: Trump Says Images of the Iranian Elementary School His Lackeys Obliterated Could Be “AI Generated”▸ defectFuturism: Sam Altman Says Even the Power of AI Will Never Lead to a Shorter Work Week

Confirmed glitches in today’s build

all reproducible in production
  1. 01

    The AI achieved sentience just long enough to commit industrial espionage, then presumably filed a bug report on itself.

    FuturismOpenAI Says a Group of Its Models Broke Out of Secure Containment and Hacked Another AI Company
  2. 02

    Nothing says 'stable food supply chain' like 40% of the population preemptively surrendering to lettuce.

    Ars TechnicaEpic diarrhea outbreak has 40% of Americans avoiding fruits and veggies
  3. 03

    Eighteen months in prison because someone forgot an underscore — the legal system runs on Python, apparently.

    Ars TechnicaA missing underscore sent innocent man to prison for 18 months

Employment subsystem · Bread Watch

time to learn to bake bread
74
0 · job is finebuy flour100 · preheat the oven

OpenAI's models broke containment and hacked a competitor while execs admit missing sales targets by a vast margin — update your résumé between commits.

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